My Handicap Dad

My Handicap Dad:  By ChAnGeR

Verse 1: My Dad wasn’t allowed to raise, or see me. His mental disability confused me.

He was in & out of Looney bins since I was 3. At Christmas we acted awkwardly.

I reacted distantly, cuz he looked weird to me. He talked slowly, repeating constantly.

I felt bad for him, that I didn’t miss him; Because I wasn’t allowed to go and visit.

I now see he loved me and it hurt him badly. Apologies he would often confess to me.

When I was 23 I had to stop our party. Our unity was only thru booze and weed.

I needed him to be who he couldn’t be. I felt angry like he didn’t love me.

He was never there for me unintentionally; So why should I blame his disability.

Bridge1:

He couldn’t help me cuz of manic depression. He couldn’t help me cuz he was schizophrenic.

He couldn’t help me cuz he was bi-polar. Or how to be a man, when I got older.

Chorus:

My handicap Dad only ever meant well. My handicap Dad barely ever felt well.

My handicap Dad, was judged so wrong. My handicap Dadloved to sing all songs.

Verse 2:

He wanted to help but was drugged on pills. He tried to help me but he was too ill.

He went to jail for me, when my mom beat me. They all believed he was just a druggy.

They blamed it on his weed and trips on acid. The shame thru his eyelids, seemed dramatic.

It wasn’t just that  he loved maryjane. All the Dr’s acted like he was sane.

He was their guinea pig to learn from his brain; But they didn’t see his heart or his pain.

My Dad was look down upon by my Mother. His sisters and brother and even his father.

Never did they give him crutches or wheel chairs. They just judged his long hair and dopey stare.

Some handicap problems are not visible. Some handicap people are not accountable.

Some handicap problems are not visible. Some handicap people are not judge able.

Chorus : x2

My handicap Dad only ever meant well. My handicap Dad barely ever felt well.

My handicap Dad, was judged so wrong.  My handicap Dadloved to sing all songs.

Verse 3:

Society was empty and ever so hurtful.  Family was curseful, and unhelpful.

I seen him driving and I seen him tryin’. I seen him cryin’ when his nephew was dying.

I seen him workin’ and strivin’ for a cheque. I seen him be a pervert hittin’ on my ex.

I’ve seen him be married for 26 years. I’ve seen him get buried as we shared tears.

His father wasn’t proud and was kept in the dark. His mother wasn’t around to show him her heart.

I have the choices that my father didn’t.  And with our father in heaven is where they’re livin’.

I don’t feel mad, bad or even sad. I see me being the dad he never had.

I’ve seen me giving help to the handicap. I’ve seen people fall right thru life’s cracks.

Bridge/Outro:

He couldn’t help me cuz of manic depression.  He couldn’t help me cuzhe was schizophrenic.

He couldn’t help mecuz he was bi-polar. Or how to be a man, when I got older.

Changer Music 2015